Funny Pickup Lines

If I bit my lip would you kiss it better?
Will you read my palm? [I don't see anything.] I didn't expect you to because love is blind.
Did you drop something? [What?] Your conversation, so let's pick it up right here.
Can I have your picture? [Why?] So I can show santa what I want for christmas!
Damn.....your ass is fine! Want to come see mine?
You dropped something. [What?] My jaw.
That's a nice dog/cat/pet. Does it have a phone number?
Do you mind if we share this cab to my house?
Baby, you're sexier than socks on a rooster.
Do you have a band-aid? [Why?] I hurt my knee when I fell for you.
What do you say we play some football? You can have first down!
You're like pizza. Even when you're bad, you're good.
You had better phone the firefighters in advance, cause when you're done with me, we'll be on fire!
Lets make like fabric softener and Snuggle!
Do you believe in love at first sight or do I have to walk by again?
Are you a parking ticket? Cause you got FINE written all over you.
Hi, who's your friend?
Are you an Alien? [No, why?] Because you just abducted my heart.
I lost my teddy bear, can I sleep with you?
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together.
Can I borrow your library card? [Why?] Cause I'm checking you out.
Drop an ice cube and say 'Now that we've broken the ice, my name is...'

Funny Pickup Lines

You be the tree, and I'll wrap you like a Koala.
You don't need car keys to drive me crazy.
You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
You sure have a great looking tooth.
I wish I were sine squared and you were cosined squared, because together we could be one.
I'm feeling a little off today. Would you like to turn me on?
Do you have a mirror in your pocket? [No, why?] 'Cause I can see me in your pants.
May I have some kisses up here, please.
If a star fell from the sky every time I thought about you, then tonight the sky would be empty.
My love for you is like diarrhea. I just can't hold it in.
Haven't I seen you before? Maybe in my dreams?
If home is where the heart is, then my home is in you.
You must be a magician, because everytime I look at you, everyone else disappears.
You want me. I can smell it.
If you were a drug, I would overdose!
If you gave me a penny for my thoughts I'd have just one penny, because i only think about one thing and that's you.
[Note: for use when someone you know is getting married] Hi, I'm throwing the bachelor/bachelorette party for a friend of mine, and I need a stripper. Interested?
Is your dad a baker? [No. Why?] Cause you have some nice buns.
I don't speak in tongues, but I kiss that way.
If I were to ask you for sex, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?

Funny Geeky Pickup Lines Funny Pics

You had me at "Hello World."
You can put a Trojan on my Hard Drive anytime.
My 'up-time' is better than BSD.
Are you an angel, because your texture mapping is divine!
You've stolen the ASCII to my heart.
You got me stuck on Caps Lock, if you know what I mean.
How about we do a little peer-to-peer saliva swapping?

Mind if I run a sniffer to see if your ports are open?
Your beauty rivals the graphics of Doom 3.
You must be Windows 95 because you gots me so unstable.
I was hoping you wouldn't block my pop-up.
Want to see my Red Hat?
If you won't let me buy you a drink, at least let me fix your laptop.
You put the SPARC in my workstation.
You make my software turn into hardware!
Isn't your e-mail address beautifulgirl@mydreams.com?
I'd switch to emacs for you.

What's a nice girl like you doing in a chatroom like this?
No, that's not a Logitech MX-100 in my pants, but thanks for noticing.
Nice Set of Floppies!
I think you could be an integral part of my project life cycle.

Funny Pickup Lines

If I had a star for every time you brightened my day, I'd have a galaxy in my hand.

If a thousand painters worked for a thousand years, they could not create a work of art as beautiful as you.

You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.

Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged!

I was wondering if you had an extra heart mine seems to have been stolen

There isn't a word in the dictionary for how good you look.

Me without you is like a nerd without braces, A shoe without laces, aSentenceWithoutSpaces

Is there an airport nearby or is that just my heart taking off?

When I'm older, I'll look back at all of my crowning memories, and I'll think of the day my children were born, the day I got married, and the day that I met you.

Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see!

I must be a snowflake, because I've fallen for you.

Are you an interior decorator? When i saw you the room became beautiful.

There is something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn't have your number in it.

Baby, if you were words on a page, you'd be what they call FINE PRINT!

You must be a hell of a thief because you stole my heart from across the room.

Do you have a twin sister? Then you must be the most beautiful girl in the world!

You look beautiful today, just like every other day.

Excuse me, but I think I dropped something. MY JAW!

If you were a booger I'd pick you first.

Funny or Not So Funny Pickup Lines

I'm not drunk, I'm just intoxicated by you.

I was so enchanted by your beauty that I ran into that wall over there. So I am going to need your name and number for insurance purposes.

If beauty were time, you'd be eternity.

If I were a stop light, I'd turn red everytime you passed by, just so I could stare at you a bit longer.

Babe, your beauty makes the morning sun look like the dull glimmer of the moon.

You'd better direct that beauty somewhere else, you'll set the carpet on fire.

If I received a nickel for everytime I saw someone as beautiful as you, I'd have five cents.

For a moment I thought I had died and gone to heaven. Now I see that I am very much alive, and heaven has been brought to me.

Sorry, but you owe me a drink. [Why?] Because when I looked at you, I dropped mine.
You look cold. Want to use me as a blanket?

Can I have directions? [To where?] To your heart.

Do you have a BandAid? I just scraped my knee falling for you.

Be unique and different, say yes.

Do you have a map? I'm getting lost in your eyes.

Fascinating. I've been looking at your eyes all night long, 'cause I've never seen such dark eyes with so much light in them.

Most people like to watch the Olympics, because they only happen once every 4 years, but I'd rather talk to you cause the chance of meeting someone so special only happens once in a lifetime.

You're so beautiful that you made me forget my pickup line.

You shouldn't wear makeup. It's messing with perfection!

Funny Pickup Lines

I'm a raindrop and I'm falling for you.

Baby, you must be a broom, cause you just swept me off my feet

I must be a Snowflake, becuase I've fallen for you.

I know somebody that thinks they might like you a lot. And if I wasn't so shy, I would tell you who it is.

Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?

Are you religious? [Why?] Because you're the answer to my prayers.

Can I lick that film off your teeth?

Can you give me directions...to your heart?

Did they just take you out of the oven? [No, why?] Because you're hot!

Do you have a map? [No, why?] Because I just got lost in your eyes.

Don't be so picky... I wasn't!

Falling for you would be a very short trip.

Hershey factories make millions of kisses a day, but I'm asking for only one.

I suffer from amnesia. Do I come here often?

Is it hot in here or is it just you?

Let's go behind that rock, and get a little boulder.

Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.

Remember me? Oh, that's right, I've met you only in my dreams.

Want to play conductor? You be the engineer and I'll go choo choo.

What do you like for breakfast?

Funny Pickup Lines

Do not use these pickup lines in a bar you will fail!

(Close hand with nothing inside and give it to her) It's my breath from when you took it away (open palm while saying this).

Coffee? Tea? Me?

Damn, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged!

Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me?

Did you have Campbell's soup today? (she answers yes/no) Because you're lookin' mmm... mmm... good!

Do you have room in your life for another friend?

Do you have the time? [Gives the time] No, the time to write down my number?

Do you know karate? 'Cause your body is really kickin'.

Does Levi's pay you for wearing those and looking that good?

Does my breath smell okay?

Does your watch have a second hand? I want to know how long it took for me to fall in love with you.

Don't walk into that building -- the sprinklers might go off!

Don't you know me from somewhere?

Ever since I met you, you've lived in my heart without paying any rent.

Excuse me miss, I don't mean to stare, but um I think you're really Beautiful"

Excuse me miss... Do you have a cigarette? Actually, I don't want one, I just wanted to start a conversation with you.

Excuse me miss? You dropped something back there? (As you look around you ask "where") Over there! (Ask again: "What did I drop?") He answers back: My jaw!

Excuse me, but did you happen to find my Nobel Peace Prize?

Excuse me, I don't want you to think I'm ridiculous or anything, but you are the most gorgeous girl/guy I have ever seen. I just felt like I had to tell you.

Excuse me, I just noticed you noticing me and I just wanted to give you notice that I noticed you too.

Excuse me, I think you have something in your eye. Nope, it's just a sparkle.